Parenting Resources

Resources for Parents

Without any doubt, parenting is no easy task in this sinful world. Today, we offer resources to assist Christian parents as they train their children to walk in paths of righteousness.

Dobson, James. Bringing Up Boys: Practicel Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Men. Tyndale, 2001.

___________. Dare to Discipline. Tyndale, 1996.

Gottman, John. The Heart of Parenting: Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. Simon & Schuster, 1997.

Murokoff, Heidi, Arlene Eisenberg, and Sandee Hathaway. What To Expect When You’re Expecting. New York: Workman, 2002.

Sears, Bill. The Baby Book. Little Brown, 2003.

Wilson, Douglas and Nancy Wilson. Standing on the Promises: A Handbook on Biblical Childrearing. Moscow, ID: CanonPress, 1997.

Parenting

Four F Parenting

Written by Dr. Bill Bagents

Many believe that it’s harder than ever to be a good parent. I’m one of those. I knew everything about children until May 15, 1984. Then, John William Bagents was born and I forgot everything I ever thought I knew. I spent almost a decade as a youth minister. I knew everything – at least everything that mattered – about teens until May 15, 1997 when that kid turned 13. If you think that’s bad, I had to unlearn about half of what I thought I learned with John in order to deal with his brother, Allen. They’re not true polar opposites, but it’s still hard to believe those two boys came from the same gene pool. In so many ways, they’re as different as night and day.

Parenting is not a lost cause. It’s not a hopeless venture. We get a lot of help. It’s good to have Dr. Glen Wittig, head librarian at Criswell College, with us today. It wouldn’t do to have a man of his standing here without mentioning a few books that help parents. I like Stephen Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. I like that excellent Boundaries Series by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. I like John MacArthur’s Successful Christian Parenting and that older volume, Parenting With Love and Logic by Foster Cline and Jim Fay. Jay Kesler’s Emotionally Healthy Teenagers is such a solid work. But, if I had to choose only one book on parenting, you know which one I’d choose.

I will rely on that good book, the good book, this morning as we talk about 4 F Parenting.

1. Fast. Start Fast. Start early. Start before you marry. Men, godly women like the one described in Proverbs 31 aren’t real common. “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” Ladies, men who truly honor the teaching of Ephesians 6:4 are rare as well. “And you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” You start parenting before you marry because your choice of a mate has so much impact on the rest of your life.
   
   
2. First. Keep first things first. Matthew 22:34-40 is one of the strongest parenting passages in all of Scripture. A lawyer asked Jesus, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus responded, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” We don’t have a closer neighbor than our spouse. And, the children come next. Before work. Before school. Before others. If you doubt that there’s a vital link between loving God and training our children to love Him, just remember Deuteronomy 6. Remember Genesis 18:19, “For I have known him, in order that he cam command his children and his household after him, that they keep the way of the Lord, to do righteousness and justice, that the Lord may bring to Abraham what He has spoken to him.” Abraham had a role in helping the Lord God fulfill his promises to him. Part of that role was parenting well.
   
   
3. Fun. If you’re going to last as a parent, you better find and keep a sense of humor. Being the first book in Scripture Genesis is foundational is so many ways. Genesis 4:1, “Now Adam knew Eve his wife and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord.” This one verse reminds us how babies are supposed to be born; they’re supposed to be born to parents who are married to one another. It also tells us the attitude in which they are to be received: as blessings from the Lord. Perhaps Psalm 127:3-5 is the more familiar statement. I know that “happy” there carries the fundamental meaning of blessed, favored by God. But, who’s happier than the person who’s blessed by God?
   
   
4. Faithful. There are no perfect parents. Even if you were perfect today and had it all together, it wouldn’t last. Kids change every day. They’re a constantly moving target. Some days they seem perfect. Some days they almost make you believe in modern day demon possession. The story of Legion from Luke 8. If it were demon possession, it would surely take more than one to account for all that they do. I know that even Proverbs 22:6 is not an absolute, iron-clad guarantee of how children will turn out. But, I do know how they tend to turn out if we don’t apply that verse. You know how it begins, “Train up a child in the way that he should go...” I can’t train my children if God in God’s way if I’m not letting God train me. Like most of us, children see better than they hear. They don’t just notice what we want them to notice. They don’t just learn when we want them to learn. They know faithful when they see it. And you can count on this, they also know fake.

Evangelistic Seminar

A Secret to congregational growth: meet the needs of the community in which you serve.

Written by Michael Farris,
Heritage Christian University Alumnus

Every Christian has a special place in the body.
The congregation's work at South Haleyville on July 29th serves as a great example of what can be accomplished when every member does their part!

Many in Haleyville, Alabama have had a difficult economic year. After a season of disastrous weather & rising unemployment, many parents struggle to make ends meet, even more so to budget for extra expenses such as backpacks & school supplies for their children. Being aware of this financial need, allows an opportunity to meet even a greater need in this society: the training of parents to train their children. After admitting the less-than-desirable results from the typical VBS, this congregation decided 3 years ago to incorporate their normal VBS into an ANNUAL PARENTING SEMINAR. (Classes for all age groups with the focused age-appropriate topics for everyone in the home, including godly principles for the family.)

What gets all the locals to step foot into a church building to enjoy listening to an hour presentation? Simple: SCHOOL SUPPLIES for their children. In an atmosphere of love and concern for all, the knowledge of the church's desire to help makes everything go very smoothly. With the advertisements making it clear that this event is not merely a 'handout' (which usually includes some wordy tract about the church that most may toss in the trash) all who registered for the Seminar were aware their only payment for all supplies is cooperation and appreciation.

But while all the members spent countless hours preparing the classrooms, running errands, packing the bags, organizing the papers, cooking the meals, etc., a few more were needed to fill key-teaching roles to provide as much helpful, engaging, enlightening, fun, and meaty content during that short 1.5 hours the visitors time there. Along with the teachers within the South Haleyville congregation for the younger ages, Heritage Christian University alumni Kyle Mashburn & Michael Farris enjoyed the honor having Dr. Bill Bagents, Vice President of Academic Affairs at HCU, on board for a special benevolent & evangelistic evening- which met a variety of particular needs relating to the nurturing of the family.

Each speaker was given the class-group appropriate for their specialized field of expertise. Kyle, whose zealous emphasis in youth ministry suited him perfectly to both entertain and teach a full class of young junior high kids about what their roles are as children to their parents. Michael, whose joy for helping others find and develop their talents, not to mention love for magic tricks, helped appeal and relate to the high school group who are on the brink of serious decisions that will chart the rest of their lives. But no one other than Dr. Bagents was asked to accept the offer to conduct the interactive discussion with an auditorium class filled with the children's parents, grandparents, and guardians. His invaluable material and experience, along with his great ability to bond with strangers made the time fly while helping each one better deal with the situations that every parent needs advice for handling.

At the end of the program, every student present got a new backpack filled with the supplies needed for their school year. Members unite for a cause, different talents are needed & used, community is helped, the Lord's name is lifted up, God's will is taught, lives are changed. Such effective works must continue.